[CURTAIN RISES]

ME: *turning off my alarm* Feeling pretty good about myself today!

DEPRESSION: Really? Did you forget about all the sad and/embarrassing things that have happened in your life?

ME: No, I didn’t forget, I just-

DEPRESSION: Remember that time in ninth grade when someone wrote something mean about you in your friend’s yearbook?

ME: Well I’d rather not, but yes I do remember that. Thanks.

DEPRESSION: I could do this all day! In fact, I think I will. Remember back in high school when that friend of yours died? Remember that time at work when you made a mistake and everyone laughed at you?

ME: I remember. Please stop bringing these things up. There’s nothing I can do about them now except feel sad.

DEPRESSION: Maybe you should sit down and draw a cartoon or write something. That would make you feel better.

ME: That’s a good idea.